


With You, I'm Finally Okay

by BumbleBeeDoll



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Angst, BBV Day 2018, Kissing, M/M, i still love needy venom woops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-30 00:13:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13938468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BumbleBeeDoll/pseuds/BumbleBeeDoll
Summary: Venom's mind has been slowly slipping away but seeing Big Boss again somehow helps him feel grounded. That is, whenever Big Boss will actually visit him.Written for BBV Day 2018





	With You, I'm Finally Okay

**Author's Note:**

> Written for BBV Day 2018, the theme is Trust & Distrust.  
> I will always love writing these two~

_"When can I see you again?"_

_"Soon."_

_"Promise?"_

_"...Yes."_

\---

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

He wasn't supposed to be awake at night longing for the spot next to him to be occupied. 

The respect Venom had for his boss was immeasurable and after learning of the mind-shattering truth, it only drove him to work himself into the ground even further for his boss. 

Venom had a new found determination to form Diamond Dogs into exactly what Big Boss was looking for. It had to meet his expectations or Venom wasn't satisfied. The Dogs themselves had noticed Venom's new mentality and still followed him loyally, even if it ended in their deaths.

What brought this all crashing down though was when Big Boss decided to visit Mother Base without notice.

Venom knew that Big Boss had his connections within the base, the cat-like man Ocelot would be the first to come to mind, to let him know how things were going but Venom had never expected him to ever show up here. 

It was the middle of the night when he appeared before Venom in his quarters, wearing basic Diamond Dogs fatigues and one of his hands gripped onto a balaclava. 

Venom had been experiencing yet another night without consistent sleep and stared at the man in front of him while sitting upright in his bed. 

When Venom's gaze reached Big Boss' face the shrapnel horn in his forehead throbbed painfully. The ache was unbearable and a cold sweat ran over his body as his vision began to darken. 

He couldn't move.

He couldn't breathe.

Everything went black.

When he came to, Big Boss was seated in one of his chairs, across the room, simply analyzing Venom's quarters. 

Venom brought his vision to Big Boss' face hesitantly and he waited a few moments to see if his mind would react so negatively again. He felt a small pang of pain in his forehead but nothing else. Breathing in deeply, Venom decided to get Big Boss' attention.

"...Boss..." Venom rasped out, causing the other man to bring his gaze over to him. 

"Hello, V." He stated blandly, his gravelly voice still the same as it was on the tape and even back when Venom was just a combat medic for MSF. Not this newly molded, slightly unstable version of Big Boss.

"Wh-What are you doing here, Boss?" Venom whispered as he started to sit up, still intently staring at him. "It's far too dangerous for you to be-"

"Lay back down, V." Big Boss commanded, his voice firm and Venom immediately slid back down onto his mattress, his head still turned towards his boss though. Big Boss slowly stood up from the chair he was seated in and made his way over to Venom.

Big Boss sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down at Venom's expectant expression.

"Don't worry about it being dangerous for me to be here. I'm not stupid enough to get caught by one of these 'Dogs' you have on watch here." He told Venom, a slight bite to his tone. Venom visibly swallowed, a pit forming in his stomach. He gave Big Boss a small, sheepish nod and Big Boss continued on.

"I'm here because I wanted to see this Mother Base myself and see how my V was holding up." Big Boss told him and Venom's eyes went wide.

_His V?_

Just what did he mean by that?

Venom couldn't deny the small leap his heart did at hearing these words from his commander. 

"Now, the fact that you're awake at this hour and the way you went unconscious upon seeing me makes me feel that I'm not incorrect in feeling that you haven't been doing well, V."

Venom quickly shook his head.

"I've been fine, Boss," Venom started. "I'm able to do a lot more missions now, Mother Base is thriving even more than-"

Big Boss cut him off from his rambling by simply placing one of his hands on Venom's forearm.

"Yes, I understand that, but all of that means nothing when your mental stability is always wavering." Big Boss firmly said to him. "I need to know that you're not suddenly going to go off the deep end."

"I won't, Boss." Venom whispered in response as he tried to keep his focus on Big Boss' face and not on the physical contact that they were sharing right now. His hand on Venom's arm was warm and it sent a surge of sparks through Venom as he continued to lay there.

What was this he was feeling?

He didn't want Big Boss to let go of him. 

"Now," Big Boss started, bringing Venom out of his trance. "What is it that my V needs?" 

There it was again.

_My V._

It repeated in Venom's head over and over.

In actuality, Venom had no idea what he needed. 

It wasn't a secret to his closest companions that he was slowly getting worse. Seeing and hearing things that aren't even there, sudden blackouts, prolonged moments of unresponsiveness. 

All of it was chalked up to the helicopter crash and his shrapnel horn affecting his brain. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't slightly distressed over his future and his control over himself.

"I... I'm honestly not sure, Boss." Venom yet again whispered back to Big Boss. The room was so quiet even with their conversation happening right now. It was like Venom felt that if he spoke too loudly, this would somehow all just end.

"Hm.." That was the only response Venom got from him and it sent a shock of panic down his spine.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Venom decided to just say what was on his mind.

"But... your presence and your grip on me is somehow making me feel tethered down again." He blurted out, a light dusting of pink spreading across his face. 

Silence.

Pure silence.

The pit in Venom's stomach from earlier was back and his body tensed up as he slowly opened his eyes to look back up at Big Boss.

Big Boss was closer than before, now slightly leaning over him and he nodded his head.

"Okay."

\---

_"You'll be back right?"_

_"Yes, V."_

_"Okay..."_

_"What? Do you not trust me?"_

_"_ _Of course,_ _I do."_

_"Then know that I'll be back someday."_

\---

Years had passed since that one night and Venom always reflected back on it when he felt his mental control slipping.

Big Boss did visit again after that.

It was only occasionally though.

Sometimes it would be like that night and sometimes it would be when Venom was out in the field in a random abandoned shack.

Whenever Venom started to have his doubts about seeing Big Boss again, he appeared, like he could sense Venom's distress.

Venom at this point hadn't lost all control yet but the two of them being together again gave him almost like a recharge for his brain.

It would be short but the small contact they would share was exactly what Venom would need.

Venom didn't understand why seeing Big Boss made him feel so much better but he reasoned with himself that it's like getting a morale boost, like a soldier being in the presence of his commander.

Starting out, it was just small touches.

Then it became kissing.

Venom didn't think that either of them had expected this to go that way.

It had been Big Boss who had done it first as an 'experiment' as he put it and Venom had lost all ability to move in that moment. The searing pain was back but he did not black out this time. As Venom's ability to comprehend everything around him slowly came back, the two had stayed where they were for longer than usual, making sure Venom was really going to be alright.

Big Boss had refused to kiss him at first after that, thinking that it wasn't safe for Venom to have these kinds of 'episodes'. Venom had been able to eventually to convince him to try again and besides minor pain, Venom was fine.

The two of them weren't able to fully understand how Venom's mind worked but Big Boss was definitely tied to something.

Was it a side effect of the hypnotism?

Was his mind instinctually at first rejecting the true Big Boss?

It was hard to comprehend and Venom wasn't sure if being with Big Boss helped or hurt him anymore.

\---

_"You're absorbing Diamond Dogs into Outer Heaven?"_

_"Yes, it's time."_

_"..._ _"_

_"Everything is falling into place now."_

_"…"_

_"V?"_

_"...Yes, Boss."_

\---

The two of them were in the commander's office of Outer Heaven, the door securely locked.

Big Boss had Venom pinned beneath him on the leather couch in the office, their lips pressed against each others. Venom attempted a fight for dominance, but it was all for show. Big Boss always came out on top and Venom would happily accept it. Their hard kissing quickly turned into making out, the usual way as of late.

Over the years, Venom followed his instructions and orders diligently. There were times he would be apprehensive at first but he'd put his faith into Big Boss and trust that he knew best. 

Venom's mind always went blank at times like this as he soaked up the affection and attention he was getting from Big Boss. As he never knew when their last time together would be, he hung onto every word said and every action done by his boss.

Big Boss, on the other hand, couldn't stop his mind from racing.

Operation Intrude N313 was only a day away and it kept sitting in the back of Big Boss' mind.

If things went to shit tomorrow, he could lose his V.

Big Boss broke the kiss and Venom's breathing was heavy as usual and it turned Big Boss' stomach with lust. He gazed down at him like prey but his expression slowly softened to one of pity.

Venom tilted his head at him.

"What is it, Boss?"

Big Boss remained silent and kept looking down upon Venom. 

He leaned in for another kiss that Venom accepted contently.

Breaking away yet again, Big Boss nuzzled his face into the crook of Venom's neck. 

Venom's face went flush at this intimate act by his boss that he wasn't expecting in the slightest.

"Boss?" He whispered, trying to get some sort of answer out of him.

"Do your mission right tomorrow." Venom heard him mutter against his skin and he stared up at the ceiling, understanding Big Boss' words.

"Of course. I always do."

"I mean it."

"Yes, yes."

\---

_"I guess I won't be seeing you again this time, huh, Boss?"_

_"…"_

_"Boss?"_

_"…"_

_"Talk to me...Please, Boss..."_

_"...Yeah, V. I guess not..."_

_"It's okay though."_

_"…"_

_"_ _I'm glad I could do this for you."_

_"…"_

_"Can you still hear me?"_

_"...I don't believe you."_

_"I mean it. You should know that by now, Boss."_

_"…"_

_"Everything I've done in my_ _life ever since I joined MSF_ _was all for you."_

_"…"_

_"Boss?"_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I tried writing it a little differently than I usually do so I hope it was enjoyable~  
> [MGS Tumblr is PudgyVenomSnake.tumblr.com!!]


End file.
